Dancing Soul

To show off is human?

Today, one of my students said that he has urges to show off when folks are watching, and asked me how to stop being aware of others watching him dance. I know that that the tango politically correct answer would be something like, "You should just focus on your partner, and not pay attention to the others in the room, except to navigate." After all, this is a social dance between two persons.

However, my first thought was, "Hmm, I know exactly what you are talking about!" We are all human and imperfect: I feel the urge to show off whenever I am passing one of my teachers at a table at a milonga, or when I know that a really good dancer is watching me. I want to impress that person, so that they want to dance with me, or are proud of my progress, or just to show off--and I am a self-conscious, shy person in general, who prefers to remain more in the background in most situations. Imagine if you are more outgoing!

So why is it a problem that we want to show off? After all, can't we also show our partner off and make them look good to attract other dance partners for them?  This doesn't have to be a purely selfish action. If we acknowledge that most of us can't stay only in the moment, focusing on only one thing/person for even a tanda, why does it matter if we think about a little showing off?

I think that the problem is that, usually, we mess up when we try harder. We get nervous about something, and our bodies tighten up. How many times have you thought, "Oh, [x] is watching, so I'll try something cool/fancy/harder," only to screw it up WHILE that person is watching? How embarrassing! I find myself thinking things like, "OK, just relax! Do NOT try to show off, just be cool. After all, this is about dancing with the partner I have right now and focusing on them. Focus! Do the right thing! Oops, I just messed up..."

Thinking about what my student asked made me realize why I prefer to dance in Buenos Aires instead of in my home community. I like the anonymity: no one knows I am a teacher; no one cares if I have status. I get to dance more than at home, because I am just some tourist. I can blend in, with my dark hair and medium height and clothing bought in Buenos Aires.

What is really silly about this, is that I know folks are watching me dance in Buenos Aires as well.  Women touch me on the shoulder and say, "Pretty feet!" after a good tanda.  Men obviously watch, because new people invite me to dance. But I don't feel the pressure to show off, and I don't feel as self-conscious. This may only be my experience, but I feel more permission both to relax, and to screw up, outside of my home community.

As a result, I have more memorable tandas in Buenos Aires; tandas that I will always remember, even if I can't remember the guy's name. Last year, there was that tanda with Hector (who I have only met once) at Sala Siranoush. The year before, it was a tango tanda (and a rocking chacarera) with Guillermo, my tango crush of the year. There was the great tanda with Juan the year before that, when we talked about life and how there are rocks in the road, in between sweet dances.

What does that say about showing off? When I am more relaxed, I show off less.  When I show off less, I invest more in my tandas. When I invest more in my tandas, I get more memorable tandas. Focusing on my partner, instead of showing off, makes for better tangos. If I dance for my partner, instead of for the tables, I will have a good time, and dance better. Showing off is human, but resisting the urge makes for stellar tango.

 

What is this "marca" thing?

When I started Argentine Tango in 1995, my first teacher told us that we didn't need to use our arms and hands to lead, just the chest.  He demonstrated by dancing around without using an embrace. We took this to heart, and copied him.

When I first went to Argentina in 1999, I noticed that a lot of the older milongueros DID use their hands and arms to lead me. When I asked some of the nuevo tango folks with whom I was studying whether this was right, they said the older guys didn't have good technique--and that's why they used their hands to help lead. I enjoyed following the older guys, and switched to going to afternoon milongas on my third visit to Buenos Aires, in order to dance with the older generation, but I didn't change much about how I led. It's funny that I didn't make any connection between the ease of following them and their technique!

I started studying with Oscar Mandagaran in 2000 while in Buenos Aires. He advocated an embrace that used chest, arms and hands as a unit, the "marca," to lead ("la marca" means "the lead"). However, it wasn't until 2008 that I converted to teaching people how to use the entire body to lead, not just the chest. When I organized for him and Georgina Vargas in the USA, he took me aside and demonstrated how much easier it was to follow complex moves if he helped me with a clear marca, rather than just moving his chest. The difference was so clear that I had to start relearning tango to dance better.

As a follower, I am sold on this precision that allows me to "let myself be led" rather than trying to figure out what the leader MIGHT want me to do.  As a leader, I like having the ability to help the follower arrive at the same place I do, with less work. To quote Oscar, "You don't want to use your hands and arms? Fine! Keep doing your four or five moves! If you want to do more, you need to help the woman understand what you want her to do!" There is a delicacy and a sublety about this way of leading that appeals to me, because it allows the fine details of tango music to come out, along with the improved connection between the dancers.

While new leaders (or leaders new to using this method of leading) can sometimes feel like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz, pointing several directions at once, the end result is worth waiting for! It takes a while to figure out how to use the hands and arms to HELP the torso lead, rather than to have them take over, which is NOT a good marca. For those of you who are sure I am wrong, don't knock it until you give it a fair trial!

Food for thought: how can we improve the tango dance experience in our communities?

My last two nights of dancing in Buenos Aires are not happening: I caught a cold, and stayed home last night and tonight. I decided it was more important to try to get well than to squeeze more dance time out of my visit; especially as I don't like to give colds to other people!

Most people take vacations to relax. I usually come home from Buenos Aires more exhausted than when I left. Perhaps this time, I will be ready to jump back into life.

I always come home with a list of things that I want to change about my teaching, about my practica, and about the Portland tango community. As I have a young son, I don't travel much in the U.S. tango community, so I don't know whether these problems exist in other communities or not.

 

1.  Guys, let's dance with the women who aren't getting dances!

Maybe they are shy, or new, or lack the confidence to really accept a cabeceo (or don't know how to cabeceo!). What I've noticed this time in Buenos Aires that I never noticed before: There are nice guys here who dance with people who have been sitting down a long time. They are good dancers, but more importantly, they are GENTLEMEN. These guys don't just dance with their favorites, and they don't peacock around, showing off. They quietly make the milonga experience better, just by being nice. We could use more of this in our community.

 

2.  Ladies, let's accept at least one cabeceo from someone below our dance level every time we go dancing.

Although the foreigners I met were obsessed with getting good dances, the Argentine women with whom I sat, danced with their friends, no matter what level they were, and they had a lot more fun. I would like to see more of this friendliness towards the men in Portland, rather than the snooty attitude that occurs when women try to demonstrate how good they are by rejecting lower-level male dancers.

 

3. Let's get to know each other as people!

There was less of a feeling of competition between women when I sat at tables of Argentine women. Instead of trying to intercept cabeceos (and yes, I sat at a table of competitive foreigners who would lean in front of others to cut off their view of the men), Argentine women chatted with me. They directed my attention to better dancers with whom I might like to dance, and my best tanda of the entire visit came out of my table partner digging me in the ribs and saying, "Hey! Look! That guy who is a really good dancer, is looking at you! Look at him!!" I am happy to see that the women in my community are starting to meet outside of tango, and to make friendships, so that there is more camaraderie at the milongas. This is a good start.

 

4.  Let's introduce new people to our friends and ask our friends to dance with them!

As a teacher, I feel this is part of my duty to my students, but shouldn't everyone try to expand the feeling of community by including the new people more? That person might not dance well now, but maybe they will in the future. Or, perhaps they will never dance well, but they are a wonderful person who we want to stay in our community. Or, perhaps that person will become your best friend! Someone recently told me about a very difficult time in their live, when coworkers were unsupportive, but their tango community reached out to them. 

 

I guess my main point is: let's spread that tango love! We have a choice as to how we act, so let's start the New Year with a resolution to be better community members!

 

La Gran Milonga Nacional 2012

I took my dance class today, spent two hours doing a photo shoot, and then ate a LOT of home-cooked meat and a glass of wine: no milonga tonight!

However, instead of a milonga review, I have the first of the videos from the Gran Milonga Nacional ready! I danced with Santiago Asencio, another student of my teachers, Oscar Mandagaran and Georgina Vargas. Considering this is the first time we ever danced with each other (or met, for that matter), we did pretty well on a plywood stage where pivoting was difficult!

 

Stay tuned (someday) for the video that was taken of me dancing with Oscar!

 

Tomorrow, I am thinking of visiting the Feria de Mataderos with a friend. I promise lots of pictures if the weather is good and we go!

 

A few more milongas: branching out

El Maipu (La Casa de Galicia, San Jose 224, 1st floor)

Although I always go to Mondays at La Nacional, I had not been to Lucy and Dany's other milonga before. I had planned to go to Plaza Bohemia like last Friday, but I decided to experiment because I was given a discount coupon for this milonga last Monday at La Nacional. That means that I don't know the the actual price for this milonga. I paid 20 pesos (water cost 12 pesos).

My friends had told me that, even though the milonga supposedly starts at 6 PM, when they went at 6:30 PM, there was no one there. I went at 7 PM, and it was not very full. I stayed until 10 PM, and it never filled up all the way, but gradually improved in possible choices of partners. This would be a good place for intermediate dancers to get out on the dance floor (or brave beginners), at least early in the evening, because there was plenty of room to dance, with a lot of space between couples.

The level is pretty good, although not quite as good as La Nacional. You can see several of the regulars dancing in this YouTube video, which also gives you a sense of the space available.

I didn't dance with anyone amazing, but I didn't have any bad dances--except one. Someone asked me to dance, and then, part-way through the tanda, he wanted my arm hanging around his neck. I finished that dance with him, deciding to say "Gracias" after it; he was spared by the cortina. Luckily, I had some decent tandas after that that got me out of my foul mood.

Here is the lovely Lucy; Dany was busy with something, but I promised I'll take their picture together on Monday.

 

Flor de Monserrat (Aires Tangueros, Av. Rivadavia 1392)

As Flor de Monserrat is only a few blocks from El Maipu, I showed up at 10 PM, when the milonga supposedly started. There was a class going on, and the guy at the door said the milonga starts at 10:30 PM. I went out to eat and came back around 11 PM.

Usually, I don't go to two milongas in the same night, but I had told a milonguero that I'd be at the first milonga he was going to, and I didn't go; so I decided to go to the second milonga he attends, at least for a little bit. This milonga costs 30 pesos. No waiter came by, so I never ordered water, as I was stuffed from dinner.

Without a reservation, I was socked in the corner where I could barely see across the (too dark) dance floor. I wasn't too worried, as I was already tired from a class, three hours of dancing, and too much food.

The level of folks I have danced with this visit reached a new low here. A man from Brazil dragged me around the dance floor mercilessly. Thank goodness the tanda was short and we started one dance into it: I was waiting for that third dance to be over in order to be polite. Hmm, I sound much less charitable than usual today. I think I reached the end of my patience with people who think they are good, but are not. I am always happy to dance with beginners who know they are beginners.

I danced with more people who ran into each other here than anywhere else so far. The floor here is very narrow, with room for one lane of dancers, and a middle space occupied by the less-skilled-at-navigation dancers. There is almost no way to avoid collisions if more than one leader on the dance floor does not navigate well (there were about three). I found it easy to navigate when I led here a few days ago, but I learned to lead at Torquato Tasso, where the milongueros tried to push me off the dance floor because I was a female leading. This is NOT a good milonga for beginners, and it is too dark to cabeceo easily.

Here is a video that shows the size of the space.

I danced a technically interesting tanda of Pugliese with the guy who taught the class before the milonga (I don't know his name), and two nice tandas of valses with guys who had a medium level of technique, but nice groove with the music.

I left around 12:45 to call my son before bedtime. People were still coming in, although the milonga ends at 2 am.

 

My vote so far

So far, although I love La Nacional, I vote for Sala Siranush/Siranoush (depends on which guide to tango you look at) BECAUSE I had my absolute most wonderful tanda so far this year there. Best compliment so far this year: "You dance as if you were born here in Palermo!" also belonged to that tanda.

La Nacional, you get another chance Monday!

 

 

 

Tango en la calle: dancing on the Avenida de Mayo

Last Saturday night was one I don't think I will ever forget: I got to dance to three live tango orchestras, on the Avenida de Mayo! There was a man filming who films at the milongas. What he told us was that he likes to put up videos to show HOW to dance at the milongas. His video of us dancing will be up on his webpage in a few weeks. This five-minute  Aires de Milonga is a montage of things that were happening the night of the open-air milonga, along Avenida de Mayo. At 4:07, there is ONE second of me dancing :-)

A plug for Carlos Neuman, the videographer: this guy really loves tango, and he really wants folks to dance well. Also, since he regularly films in the milongas, he has some good footage for those of you who have not been here and want to see what it is "really" like. I don't usually take my camera along with me, and I usually just dance, so I am not very helpful in this category; he is.

There were 8000 square meters of dance space along the Avenida, according to the news (sorry if you don't speak Spanish). There were people everywhere, strolling, sitting and listening to music, dancing in flipflops, eating . . . I have never seen an area as stuffed with humans as the areas around the stages.

There was a pride and an energy surrounding the event that I have not felt before here. Dancers were discussing it days before. When I bought shoes, the saleswoman was talking with a guy buying shoes about their plans to dance. The tango world buzzed with excitement, and the the news coverage also had a tone that I usual hear reserved for futbol games!

 

 

Strikes, accidents and floods affect even tango-crazed tourists

Strikes and demonstrations

There was another rolling strike scheduled for today, so each subte line was supposed to be closed for three hours. On Sunday, I took the subte without paying because no one was at the ticket windows, and all the "emergency" gates were open for free access. Monday, there was a strike as well.

In addition to that, there are demonstrations going on for all sorts of things. I have been reading the papers, but I am not 100% up on everything going on in the judicial system re: free speech. A very impassioned woman at the milonga was telling me that a big demonstration had been cancelled for today, as the judges had decided to postpone a deadline for rights for two months.

On the way home from the milonga tonight, there was a gathering of youth on Avenida Callao near Congreso, that seemed to consist of large banners that I couldn't read (draped the wrong way); loud drums; beer-swigging young people; and shouting young people. Something about solidarity.

 

The toxic cloud

This morning, the news reported that a toxic pesticide from a Chinese ship at the port had burned, creating a toxic cloud of gas, headed for Buenos Aires. Since it was going to rain, we assumed that it would still probably be safe to go out. However, when I headed out for lunch, they sent us out of the subway and closed the doors. The downpour started at about the same time, and every taxi in sight was taken. After walking about six blocks and getting soaked, I finally found a taxi. Because of the traffic, it took forever to go just twenty or so blocks.

Later, the news reported that it was NOT a pesticide, that it was relatively not dangerous, and people should stop panicking. Frankly, I don't know which story to believe. My skin felt prickly when I was out, but that might just have been all the chemicals in the air here, added to the rain.

 

Flooding in Belgrano

We had over 111 millimeters of rain today in an hour (I was unfortunately outside for part of that), and Belgrano flooded. The news had pictures of people wading across streets, with police helping old ladies cling to lines stretched across the street, so that they were not swept away. There were videos of cars being swept down the street. I also saw footage of a guy canoeing down a street.

Even here, where there was no flooding, the streets were so full that it was impossible to avoid getting soaked at least to the knees when buses and cars went past, or from puddles that were too big to jump. I took a towel with me to the milonga to dry off enough to put my dance shoes on.

 

Low attendance at Lujos (El Beso, Riobamba and Corrientes)

I assumed that a lot of people would stay home because of the awful weather and consequently awful traffic; I was right. This footage shows a night with a LOT more people at the dance (this is what you normally see at El Beso).

Today, the milonga started at six. Since last week, I went later and had to sit in the second row, I went around 6:45ish. There were a total of eight people there, plus the wait staff. Even one of the organizers hadn't made it there yet, so the flustered person helping to seat me asked me what seat I wanted: that must be a first.

Eventually, the milonga filled up a bit. I danced until 10:15. At that point, I had danced with almost every guy in the place at least once. Interestingly, the rain seemed to have kept the male tourists away! I danced with Manuel, who is Spanish but lives here, and another guy who didn't look familiar, but who spoke Spanish. However, until about 10, I didn't see any foreign men come in (there were a few women who were obviously not Argentine).

I've noticed that, each year I come here, I go dancing earlier. Yes, I'm getting older. Yes, I like to call my son before his bedtime. Yes, I am happy to dance for three or four hours, instead of the whole night. However, I think this year there are more good afternoon dances AND since I get to dance pretty much every tanda, I get tired faster than the years when I sat out more.

Rejoicing that the rain had stopped at least for a while, I walked home, detouring to La Americana for my favorite tarta pascualina.

 

Milongas: Flor de Milonga and La Milonguita

Tuesday: Flor de Milonga (Aires Tangueros, Rivadavia 1392)

This was a new milonga for me. La Flaca Lucia and her partner, Gerry (an Irish guy) run this milonga.They are very friendly, comfortable folks. It was nice to be greeted with, "I saw you dance last night at La Nacional. You are good!"

The dance space is quite small, with barely room for the row of tables for "singles" on one side, but more room on the other side. Most people ordered food, and looked like they enjoyed it, so this would be a good place to eat and dance. I had already eaten, so I can't give a food review/prices.

This was the first day this milonga started at 7 PM, rather than at 10 PM. I decided to go early because it was free until 8 PM: probably a mistake. It was almost completely tourists (Lucia's students) for a while. Most of them were good enough dancers to be enjoyable. Only one was "Boy Scout" duty, but we should all do our community duty, right? Paybacks for all those milongueros who have danced with me in the past.

Things picked up when no one wanted to dance milonga, and the Italian woman next to me started bouncing around to the milonga. I invited her to dance, and she assumed she had to lead! We switched lead and follow, and had a BLAST! I hate to say it, but she was the best leader I've danced with who was a foreigner, and she was better than a lot of the Argentine men, as well. We did a vals set later. The nice thing was that this milonga is very relaxed, and the guys still danced with us. Later, I was told that one of the gay-friendly milongas happens at this place, so the regular milonga rules are relaxed here in terms of gender.

The evening continued to improve. I danced with one Argentine guy who was turned out to be a stage dancer: nice and dynamic, with fancier moves, but still paying attention to navigation and safety. When his friend showed up, he watched me and then pounced for the next tanda. Both of them danced well, and I did two tandas with each of them. It was the first time this trip that I could use all the turn technique and adorno technique I've been working on with Oscar and Georgina.

I had just changed my shoes to go home when they did the chacarera set, but I danced anyway.

 

Wednesday: La Milonguita (Sala Siranoush, Armenia 1353)

Sala Siranoush is part of a large structure with several buildings, which you reach by a gate at the street. You pay for the milonga right at the entrance (35 pesos), and there is a security guard as well.

The dance hall is beautiful, large, and air-conditioned. The room was not very full when I arrived at about 7:45, but by 8:30, it was pretty full. When I left around 11 PM, it was just starting to thin out a bit. On the whole, there was a good feeling in the room, with tables of men and tables of women alternating around the dance floor. It was pretty much impossible for me to even see the folks at the other end, but I dance all but two tandas; one of them was a choice not to dance because the music was a bit strange.

Although I have danced many times at La Viruta across the street, this was a new venue for me: two new places in two nights! This was the first time I went dancing where I had to take a taxi home. It cost 40 pesos, but it was worth it!

I had the best tanda of my visit so far. I think he said his name was Horacio. Two of the three women at my table went home, and the other woman said, "Quick! That guy across the room is looking at you! He is REALLY good!" And he was. Wow! There was feeling in every step. There was no "get used to each other" part of the first dance: it just worked immediately. We were in the zone. After the first dance ended, we just grinned stupidly at each other for a moment before starting to talk. Lovely, lovely, lovely!

 

 

 

Milongas: Lujos on Sunday, El Maipu on Monday

Although it is getting hotter and hotter, the milongas are air-conditioned, making them feel cool, despite the press of humans inside.

Lujos (Plaza Bohemia), Alsina 2540

Yes, I am sticking to my neighborhood a lot this year. Notice that I've been to two different milongas at Plaza Bohemia; two different Lujos milongas (Plaza Bohemia and El Beso), and now have wandered a few blocks down Alsina. Tonight I will probably to over to Nuevo Chique, which is only a block or two from La Nacional. With taxis costing almost 10 pesos just to put the flag up, I am walking a lot more. Plus, there are great milongas in my neighborhood!!

The dance floor at Plaza Bohemia lists towards the door. After a dance or two, you can feel that there is a definite tilt. However, the dancers accept it, grimace, and readjust; if not, we'd all be in a heap at the one edge!

The tables are arranged all around the floor, with a "guys" side, a "ladies" side (more or less), the most-populated side a mix of male and female tables, with a few larger groups; and most of the tables for couples on the other side or in the back.

Sunday, I had a table one back from the edge, and didn't get as many dances as the other night when I have a ringside seat. On the other hand, I felt exhausted, and I have noticed that the days I don't really feel like dancing, I apparently send off some kind of signal that says, "Leave me alone!" I still got to dance enough to make me happy, with a few breaks to make a list of "guys to avoid" and "guys to cabeceo" in my head. For the first time, I had someone thank me for looking at them! He was Argentine, but obviously more of a beginner. I now do what I call "Boy Scout" dances wherever I go: I dance with almost anyone once, even if they are not very good. After all, they will never get better if all the women avoid them!

Yes, the fans are back! Men, women--everyone--has a fan. Garish fans are everywhere, especially on the men's tables. Perhaps the women pick theirs to go with an outfit, and the guys just grab a fan? As I passed his table, I noticed that one guy I tend to dance with for valses was using the same hot-pink fan that I bought last year. I love that everyone uses a fan. Too bad they are all from China!

El Maipu (La Nacional), Alsina 1465

It felt great to be back at La Nacional. It is a popular milonga, as is always very crowded. This time, I remembered to call for reservations. Even so, we were at the second table back at the end of the room (they have redesigned how the tables are arranged, so there are fewer tables at the side and more at the end.

The only problem I had with that space last year, was the slippery floor. This year, the floor feels wonderful. Someone told me that they had a new floor put in, imported from Slovenia. I don't know if this is true, but it is a new floor, and it is nice!

I met up with Sarah, who had been living in Portland this fall. We went to the milonga together, so I actually have teeny clips of me dancing! Thank you Sarah! It is pretty much impossible to see down the line of dance, even to get a cabeceo for dancing; so it was not possible to follow me dancing :-)

 

Here is another one, also very short (the video and the guy!):

 

Guys: this is why I keep working on having you dance in small spaces! Practice, practice, practice!

Although the length of the room made it impossible to cabeceo a few guys I usually dance with who were at the opposite end of the room, there were plenty nearby. I sat out the first tanda of milongas, but otherwise, danced the entire time we were there.

 

 

 

Plaza Bohemia, a lesson, and a shopping frenzy: what a day!

Lesson with Oscar and Georgina

I had my first lesson of the trip today with Oscar Mandagaran and Georgina Vargas. Oscar has been my main teacher since 2000, and Georgina for the past five years. They rock, which is why they are my teachers! At least here I don't have to argue with everyone that they are stage dancers. Here, people know that they dance social dance milonga. Yes, they also dance on the stage, but they are not stage dancers. They are simply the best, in my humble opinion.

For the first time ever, we didn't start by working on my walk! I guess that means I am starting to get there. It's nice to hear your teachers say things like, "Wow! You haven't lost very much in the year since we've seen you! Ok, let's get to work!" instead of "What happened???" which is what they asked last year.

I have quite a list of things I want to accomplish in ten days of lessons, but it's nice when they say I am entering a higher stage of dancing. Yay!

 

Shopping frenzy

Georgina has started her own line of clothing, so I've already spent most of my clothing budget without going to any stores. I have some new skirts; two top/skirt outfits; a new top/pants outfit; and a dress cut down in the back so far that it's almost indecent, in a lovely blue print that I'll wear as soon as I figure out a way to keep it on better.

Don't worry, shoppers! I will still wander through the stores and give you a what's-hot list, but I probably won't buy much more myself.

 

Plaza Bohemia (Alsina 2540)

I used to go to the Friday afternoon dance at Centro Leonesa (Nino Bien). If you remember from last year's blog and the year before, that was always my favorite milonga. It moved, apparently because of the cost of the room rental. Now, it is called Plaza Bohemia, and is at Alsina 2540. Definitely not as high-class in terms of the space, but a lot of the same folks go, so the level is fair.

The price is lower than at Lujos, which cost 35 pesos. This milonga cost 25 (and the water was 12, instead of 14 pesos).

I got there later than I had planned, about 8 PM (it runs from 6 PM until 2 am, but when I left around 11:30, it was starting to thin out). Apart from sitting out a tanda to find the waitress and get water, I danced the entire time. I got a nice spot at a front table. It did not let me see behind me, but I had a good view of the rest of the room.

The music was really good, a nice mix of 1930s and 1940s music, but a tanda of Pugliese cleared the floor. Age-wise, I was probably almost the youngest person there, but there was a mix of middle-aged and elderly folks. I have seen many of the same people at Salon Canning in the afternoons. If you want to do the "scene" for tango, this is NOT the place. If you want to just go and dance, with none of the "Here's my card, I teach tango" or the "Hey, Baby!" comments, this is a good place.